CARE-FRONTING
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Opening Prayer
Thank you, Jesus—thank you for giving me everything I need to follow you and do your will. Thank you, not only for your words of instruction, but for your examples that instruct me as I impact the world around me.
Read JOHN 4:16–30
For additional translations of the passage, use this link to Bible Gateway.
16 He told her, “Go, call your husband and come back.”
17 “I have no husband,” she replied.
Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. 18 The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.”
19 “Sir,” the woman said, “I can see that you are a prophet. 20 Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews claim that the place where we must worship is in Jerusalem.”
21 “Woman,” Jesus replied, “believe me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. 22 You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. 23 Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. 24 God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.”
25 The woman said, “I know that Messiah” (called Christ) “is coming. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.”
26 Then Jesus declared, “I, the one speaking to you—I am he.”
The Disciples Rejoin Jesus
27 Just then his disciples returned and were surprised to find him talking with a woman. But no one asked, “What do you want?” or “Why are you talking with her?”
28 Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, 29 “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Messiah?” 30 They came out of the town and made their way toward him.
New International Version (NIV)Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
Reflect
Do you view speaking truth and showing love as an either/or option or as a both/and package?
In his book Caring Enough to Confront, David Augsburger coins the term ‘care-fronting,’ which marries the need for love (caring) with the need for truth (confronting). He writes: ‘Care-fronting is offering genuine caring that lifts, supports, and encourages the other. (To care is to bid another to grow, to welcome, invite, and support growth in another.) Care-fronting is being upfront with important facts that can call out new awareness, insight, and understanding. (To confront effectively is to offer the maximum of useful information with the minimum of threat and stress.)1
Jesus’ encounter with the Samaritan woman illustrates care-fronting at its finest! She was scorned by the Jews because of her race and probably shunned by her own community because of her lifestyle. The rarity of the respect shown by Jesus probably prompted her startled rejoinder: ‘You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?’ (v. 9). As she drew water from the well, Jesus drew her into conversation, confronting her with important truths about God, spiritual thirst, worship, her own lifestyle, and himself.
Augsburger writes, ‘If I love you, I must tell you the truth … Will you hear love in my truth?’2 When Jesus spoke truth, the woman heard his love and responded by confessing, ‘I have no husband’ (v. 17). Those who choose to remain in darkness ‘will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed.’3 This woman, however, when care-fronted by Jesus, ventured out from the shadows and stepped into the light, not only allowing her deeds to be exposed but even proclaiming publicly, ‘Come, see a man who told me everything I’ve ever done. Could this be the Messiah?’ (v. 29).
Apply
Seek God’s strength to voice hard but necessary truths.
Closing prayer
Lord Jesus, I ask for gentleness and sensitivity to temper my truth- telling with love.
1 David Augsburger, Caring Enough to Confront, third edition (Revell, 2014), 10 2 ibid., front matter 3 John 3:20
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